a ticket to the coast...and, a side of enlightenment, please.

Friday afternoon I was completely exhausted. Every Friday at 3:30 I realize why when I was going through grade school and I'd ask my teacher "so, what do you have planned for this exciting Friday night?!" they'd usually respond "going to bed and sleeping until I have to be here on Monday morning". It's one thing to be exhausted from demanding physical activity like working out, construction work, etc. however, teaching is mentally exhausting. Though I am not lifting weights or pouring conrete each day- rather, I am telling David for the hundreth time that he can't use the classroom mat as his own personal boxing ring, that John needs to complete is own work instead of having his tutor do it for him, that DG can't eat in class, and Peter, yes, yes you can get a drink of water and that the sentence "I'm going to shopping" doesn't make any sense- and, neither does "I'm going to running," and that "Can I have?" isn't a complete sentence all while managing the classroom cheats and breaking up arguments. phew. So, yes- Friday afternoon is always a tiring point of the teacher's life.

And, of course- I continue to use Friday afternoons as a planning period for my weekend adventures instead of hopping in bed until Monday morning arrives. This past Friday, Mike, Sarah and I decided it was time to get away from the pollution and find nature. So, after a 5 minute discussion on where we should go and what we would do, we threw on some shorts, packed an overnight bag and hopped a train to Hua Hin (thanks to our handy dandy Thailand books that suggested our destination spot). The train ride was about $6 and took about 4 hours and we stayed at a tiny guest house on the beach. Having arrived at around midnight we had NO idea what the beach would even look like and really had no clue where on earth we were. We slept in REAL beds with mattresses Friday night and woke up to birds chirping and NO SMOG. That in and of itself was worth the 4 hour train ride...but then- we walked down a sandy path which led to the softest, whitest sandy beach my toes have ever touched.. the water was beautiful (the first body of CLEAN water I've seen...clean meaning: it wasn't murky and grey like the river and didn't smell of sewage). On the beach were lounge chairs that you could rent for the day for the small price of a bottle of water. We bought a couple bottles of water and were led to a group of chairs complete with an umbrella right in the middle of the beach. I couldn't believe it.. I looked up at the sky and in my heart thanked God for creating such a spectacular place for us to enjoy. To say the least, that beach reminded me that all of the world isn't as disgustingly polluted by smoke and people as Bangkok. Blue skies..white sands..AND, OH MY WORD. GREEN TREES AND MOUNTAINS- yes, that's right. A beach, AND mountains. I wanted to cry. Never having been to the west coast USA, Hawaii or any beach with a moutainous backdrop, this was my first experience of enjoying the two best components of nature..beach and mountains. I'd say it was the "love-child" of two of my US homes- Florida and North Carolina...and it's name is Hua Hin. Fabulous town..rich in many cultures as it's the hub for many travellers visiting the Gulf of Thailand. We enjoyed our afternoon and early evening on Saturday riding motorbikes through the mountains for less than $5. (Sorry I'm always talking about prices of things..but, everytime we do something we're always blown away at how cheap everything is to the point that we feel like we must tell everyone how absurdly valuable the US dollar is here!) So, Saturday was a fantastic day and ended with a 3hr bus ride back to Bangkok and a near-death experience in the backseat of a NASCAR taxi (or so it seemed). And here, here I sit in little Latphrao at an Internet cafe telling you of God's wonderous creation...

The four hour train ride on Friday afternoon gave me a chance to read my Thailand travel book I've been so anxious to study. The majority of the book suggests travel hot-spots and interesting monuments and temples to see (ugh, temples...I'm sick of them); however, in the back there's about a 20 page section on Thai religion. I've mentioned Buddhism several times in these posts, and how the practice and belief of buddhism completely perplexes my mind and heart. I've seen people giving gifts to the golden statues, bowing to images and monks, but- I didn't really know what it was all about..

Well- Buddhism is all about... death.

There's a belief in this "ladder" that every man climbs during their life of reincarnation. The top of the ladder is the ultimate goal: Nirvana, which is the final escape from the evils of the world and the hellish state of being alive on earth in a fleshly state. By doing good deeds and living close to the "middle way," one can earn and receive good merit during one lifetime that is basically used as points to climb a little bit higher on the ladder of reincarnation (getting closer to Nirvana with each reincarnation). The "Middle Way," is a set of standards that describes being a "good" person having loyalty, trust, honor, kindess and aiming towards a life of self-detatchment. Any ordinary man is obviously incapable of naturally achieving a state of this Middle Way perfection, which is why monks are the role models for common-man Buddhists. Monks dedicate their lives to living in detatchment from material possessions, and everything they have is donated by the buddhist believers and in exchange, the monks instruct the Buddhist believers how to live a life in order to follow the Middle Way so that hopefully, when the believers die, they'll be a few steps higher on the ladder of reincarnation, so that one day, hopefully, they'll finally be freed into the state of Nirvana.

Buddha was believed to have been reincarnated hundreds of times and around the 500th time, laid on his side in a restful pose and while in meditation, died and entered the state of Nirvana. The fact that Buddha reached Nirvana is what all the Buddhist religion is about. Nirvana itself is what they all want. They want freedom from themselves and freedom from the miserable task of life; however, the irony is the fact that they all believe that they'll never actually come close to Nirvana, because they'll never be good enough or live close enough to the Middle Way, and never earn enough good merit during their reincarnations to reach the state of rest and peace of Nirvana. Monks are believed to lead a lifestyle closest to the Middle Way; therefore, they are closer to Nirvana than common man; therefore, that is why they are respected (I also found out that any man can be a monk, and most buddhist men practice the monk lifestyle and live in the temples for about 3 mo. during their lifetime).

The life of detachment and denial is what they all aim for, and making merit is the only way to achieve the denied life (this is what all the Buddhist holidays are about). Buddhist holidays (they seem like they're almost everyday) give Buddhist men and women a chance to earn merit and make up for any merit they haven't had the time to earn, by- going to temples and giving money/food to monks, praying to Buddha and giving him gifts, releasing birds at the temples (seen as showing mercy and kindness to animals).. it's all about earning merit, and giving and doing "good" things on some sort of point scale. From what I've read, when they pray, it's not like they're asking Buddha to help them in any way (like I do when I pray to God)- instead, it's praising Buddha out of respect because he reached what they all want- eternal release and a final death to escape the imprisonment of their fleshly, earthly bodies.

So, the basics- they want death. They want release. They praise Buddha...but they don't pray for guidance and help. It's their own duty to live a life as close to "perfection" as possible with the hope that in their next lives, they'll be that much closer to Nirvana...they want release and detatchment.

My prayer is that having this brief knowledge will somehow guide my path in how to direct a conversation with a Buddhist. Rather than simply taking them for a "walk down the ol' Roman's road," I know what it is they're looking for in life and also in death. All I would really have to do is say that come their time of death, they are really going to die and die only once, but that sadly, their "Nirvana" will be much worse than imprisonment of flesh and in fact they'll be imprisoned somewhere far worse.

I could'nt imagine hating life. I couldn't imagine HAVING to hate life. I can't believe they are in search of death and believe they'll never get there..when really, it's all much closer than we think..

gulp.